Constantly ask what they really want
This may sound obvious, but for me it made all the difference.
Before I interact with people, I ask myself this question: “What do they really want?”
Like if I’m writing someone an email, I ask, “Why are they really reading this email?”
If I’m contacting an agent, I ask, “Why are they really doing this job?”
If I’m about to perform a show, I ask, “What are they really hoping to get from a night out at a concert?”
Thinking of everything from the other person’s point of view is one of the best things you can do in life.
Be what they want. And maybe they’ll be what you want, too.
I can feel it Derek, appreciate everything you doin for the artists here.
recprication! BEFORE the contact! ....got it, thanks!
Derek, There is a trick to this now though. Because of the awesome info spreading powers of the internet there is so much knowledge about "Marketing." I can't believe how many people know the rules about "marketing" these days.
So, what am I getting at, "don't be fake!" Meaning if you "YOUNESS" to much, to more people than you should it will be sensed and in some cases freak people out.
There is a guy, at a local coffee shop, pretty nice guy, but he tries this "Youness" so hard on so many ladies. He always grabs the door for them, always says, "Have a great day..." and you know the response he gets... NO TO COOL!
In fact some of the ladies there give him the "who is this creep" look and you know, I don't blame them. He is so in their face with "Youness" ...so , what are your thoughts on this.
PS: He looked liked he wanted to kill me one day when one of the ladies he tried to "Youify" to death, came down and sat by me and said hello, when I hadn't opened the door for her, or said, "HAVE A NICE DAY!" out of the blue, etc.
Your thoughts on this?
Marcus : I agree. With many of my suggestions I write, I'm offering the counter-intuitive point of view, not expecting someone to go all the way, but encourage them to go towards that from the opposite point.
I wrote and recorded the most recent cd for animal enthusiasts. Now what?
Good is significant!!!!!!!!!!!
I am fully supportive of the idea see things from the perspective of others ... That person who cut his car in traffic, had his reasons. The neighbor who spoke abruptly, it was not by intention, and perhaps most important: our family is the spouse, siblings, parents, and finally always put yourself in someone else's shoes ... if you start practicing it right the world will be better
The big issue is that I sometimes have no idea of what others really want. Do you think that this is a muscle that can be exercised?
I have an idea.
For those worried about being too much their quikry self, or as Marcus at #5 put it, too much you, then I think the way to know whether you are being "too much" is two things:
First, yes you are, because any new skill, such as writing in metaphors, or dribbling a basketball, gets used too much. I try to cut people some slack, even as I am cringing.
Second, my main idea, is you could check yourself by asking, "Does this feel sustainable?" If it is too much method acting then the honest answer is no, which means take it down a notch. Because "no" probably means your better judgement knows that you are faking a bit too much. Which creeps people out.
I think an natural growing quirk is sustainable.
5 for 5!