Ben Kihnel
I just got the call from the super-connected Alex Steininger that our mutual friend Ben Kihnel died in his sleep. He was only 48.
Ben was employee #2 of CD Baby. (#1 was the great John Steup.) John hired Ben the day we moved the company to Portland, Oregon. I don’t even know how we met Ben. Then all of the early employees at CD Baby were Ben’s friends, so Ben was really the start and the heart of everything for us in Portland.
Ben was one of my favorite people. Such a warm, open, empathetic guy. Such a great conversationalist. People often talk insincerely — echoing cliché phrases, or saying one thing but meaning another. But even Ben’s shortest communications were really sincere and engaged — fully listening, understanding, and sharing. He was always great at getting to the heart of things.
I hope I remember to tell people how I appreciate them when they’re alive.
So sad he died so young. We last talked a year or two ago, and he was wonderful as ever. I’ll always remember him fondly. He was a really special person — an exceptional soul. The world was a better place with him in it.
Ben was the one who told me to post the “232 sand dollars” story on my website, because he thought it defined me. That’s why many of the comments on that page from 2011 are thanking Ben.
I don’t take many photos, so the only two I have of him are from 2002: on the phone at work, and at a New Year’s Eve party. But I can hear his voice clearly in my head.
Ben wasn't why I got hired, but Ben was my first interaction when I showed up to interview over 18 years ago. During a 5-minute car ride, he made me feel like I had found my place, and I'm still here all these years later, because he was kind enough to pick me up from a sketchy bus stop, just so I could get to the office to meet with you & Gray.
Oh my goodness he sang good and was always nice to me
I'm terribly sorry for your loss, and for all who had the privilege of meeting him. While I didn't know Ben, I aspire to be remembered for the same qualities he impressed upon you.
I'll tell you how you, likely, met Ben Kinhel. He was a talented young singer/songwriter/lead guitar player/artist who had recordings with his band(King of Spain) and thought he could make it a little further down that yellow brick road by signing up with CD Baby.
Because he lived in Portland, Ben probably brought in his precious few CDs directly to the "warehouse", in hopes that he would sell them outside of music business standards.
He was (when he wanted to be) very charismatic and collaborative. So it must have been very natural for John and you to want to hire someone who was experiencing the music industry's pitfalls and remained hopeful. He was an A-typical CD Baby artist who must have refreshed your resolve and affirmed your endeavors. His very presence at work, would be evidence of your success and a great PR move. There were dreams to be exploited in a music lottery and Ben had bought a ticket and was willing to help sell them.
I think Ben truly believed he was helping people and he proved it. People kept dreaming because they knew he was still dreaming. Including you and I, Derek.
I'm sure he helped refine, develop, and sustain CD Baby with greater influence than simply being an early employee. Ben was too powerful and too cool. Everybody felt more powerful and cool when he cast his spell on them.
Thanks for memorializing him, Derek.
Frank
A friend/ former band mate & CD Baby employee
I can't believe this is true - i just text messaged him a few weeks ago. Ben lived in our building in Studio City and we often would meet by the wash and smoke and chat. My girlfriend and I had him over several times for Thanksgiving and Christmas because he didn't have any family here and had a connection with my girlfriend as they are both from Jacksonville. I am so sad to hear this, he was such a sweet guy. If there is any information on his services, we would like to know.
I can't believe this. Ben was my guide and my mojo bearer at CD Baby. I'll never forget hearing him and Rayburn play King of Spain for me the first time. This is so f***ing sad. :(
I only knew Ben for a short time, he was a beautiful soul, he will be missed dearly, God will keep him warm in heaven, rest in peace my friend <3
Sorry for your loss Derek. Through your words, I do feel like I knew Ben as well. Thanks for sharing and ever grateful to Ben for convincing you to write the 232 sand dollars story. It is the most beautiful I have read and as he said, is the description of your personality.
Ben and I were bar-flies at the same place. He was my first friend there. Maybe he didn’t mean to, but it felt like Ben took me under his wing. He was the one who said: hey, you can be apart of the group. He never had an agenda. I watched the way he talked to people; he just wanted to express himself and hear what others had to say. He was thoughtful in that sense. I didn’t know him for long. But, I could tell he was someone who felt and thought very deeply. I could tell he was a true artist. He moved to the other side of town about a year ago. Hadn’t seen him since. Very sad I’ll never see again. I hope Ben rests easy, what ever shape that might take.
Hi Derek. You were on my mind and so I wandered around the internet to see what you are up to these days, and landed on your announcement about Ben. I am utterly heartbroken. I often think of Ben and his contagious enthusiasm for music, life, and friends. He would often be the first one to greet me as I rode my bicycle into the CD Baby Warehouse each morning with that grin from ear to ear. That was my timestamp that I was now at work with friends and people who care, and we had a mission together.
Ben’s sudden passing validates the notion to reach out to friends when they are in your thoughts, especially the ones who have made an impact in your life, to let them know that. And so, I am reaching out to YOU to let YOU know that you have made an impact in mine. Your company and vision created a community and a family, with an important mission and it was an extreme privilege to work with you and Ben and John, and the rest of that family. It remains one of the most positive and impactful experiences in my life.
Love to you. Love to Ben. Love to all the CD Babies.
It’s interesting because I was on a hike and saw his memorial and I was shocked because I realized I knew him. Ben used to come into my job and I was always the one who helped him out so we got to know each other while he was in the lobby waiting or on his way out. He would always come in with really cool hair colors and we would chat about whatever it was. He would always make all of us laugh and smile. He was always busy and on the road but always seemed so full of energy so young and vibrant with a smile on his face. May he rest in peace 🤍
Thank you for sharing these words Derek. Ben was so very special to me, and seemingly to everyone lucky enough to have known and spent time with him. He always made me and my wife Kaytee feel so special. I miss his smile and laugh every day, but he is a great angel to have looking over us.